Building Better Habits (For People Who Are Lazy & Easily Tempted.)

I am not one of those people that naturally gravitates toward GOOD habits and WHOLESOME choices. Bread makes me happy. Running does not. It’s weird – because I know the kind of person that I want to be (lean, athletic, responsible for making good choices), and I know how I feel when I am (lighter, happier, a wee bit smug) and yet, if I am given even a WHIFF of an excuse to renege, I will grab it. I will happily scarf down the extra slice, polish off the rest of the bottle and crawl back under the covers for the rest of the day.

So, in the words of those silly memes on Facebook – Don’t Be Like Charlotte.

However, if the temptation to habit slack sounds even remotely familiar, you may want to try some of the ways I cajole, trick and drag myself reluctantly towards the better version of myself. One kale chip at a time.

Pick Your Non-Negotiables: These are the things that you agree with yourself that you will absolutely do, whether you like it or not. These are your lowest common denominators. Your bare fucking minimum commitments to yourself. Mine for example are – 5 x classes a week (circuit/yoga/barre/weights), no drinking Monday and Tuesdays, 1 x Blog Post a week and the newly introduced 5 hrs phone free on Sundays, (which sounds easy until you can’t remember the name of the bloody restaurant, get lost trying to find it and struggle with the 15% math when it’s time to pay the bill.) Your non-negotiables might be around how much money you save, or hours you sleep, or how many times a week you sit down as a family for dinner. This is the ‘No Excuses’ bottom of the pyramid, so just choose a few things that matter to you and with repetition they will consolidate into effortless behaviour, which is basically THE DREAM when it comes to building better habits.

Try Habit Stacking: I learnt this idea from James Clear’s ‘Habit Academy’ and it is a useful trick for making new habits stick easier. It works on the premise that there are a number of things we all do every day, without even thinking about it. We get up, we brush our teeth, we take the bus to work, we have a coffee, we sit down for dinner every night – that kind of stuff. If you are trying to create a new habit, the chances of it succeeding are much stronger if you ‘stack’ it on the back of a habit already hardwired into your brain. You might choose to do 10 push ups before your shower, meditate for a few minutes whilst the kettle boils, or write in your journal on your bus ride home. The thing you already do acts as a natural trigger for the new thing you want to do, making it easier for your neurons to get on board with it.

Tailor Your Environment: It was Thaler and Sunstein (2008) who came up with the concept of ‘Choice Architecture’, which is just a fancy way to say that our decisions are affected by the way in which they are presented to us. Which explains why we might find ourselves with an unplanned Twix in our trolley (confectionery at the counter), or a bucket of popcorn bigger than our head (‘would Madam like a Large for only $1 more?’). When it comes to our habits, we want to create the path of least resistance for positive behaviours, without resorting to drastic measures (all the junk food in the bin and the booze down the drain). Take lunch for example. I work from home and if I did not get a weekly delivery of healthy meal options, I would probably carb-load myself into a sandwich induced coma. I purposely buy my least favourite biscuits, so I eat less of them and have bottles of water everywhere, so I drink more of it. When it comes to most things in life, inertia is particularly strong if taking action requires effort. So, tailor your environment accordingly – put your trainers by the door, hide your chocolate on a high shelf and never agree to meet your badly-behaved friends on a school night 😉

Know Thyself: We are all different. The key to building better habits is to understand what YOU are more likely to respond to, or be motivated by and then tailoring your tricks accordingly. Gretchen Ruben, in her book ‘The Four Tendencies’ explains that by pinpointing our distinct personality type (or ‘tendency’), we can focus on habit forming strategies that work best for us. Upholders behave very differently to Rebels. And Questioners respond differently to Obligers. Not sure what the hell I am talking about? Click HERE to see which one you are.

And if, like me, you sometimes find it a struggle to be the better person, there is a fridge magnet out there that wants to remind you:

‘You are allowed to be both a Masterpiece and A Work In Progress. Simultaneously.’

This GET HEALTHIER post is brought to you by someone who is currently under construction and thanks you for your patience.